MOTHERING AN INFANT

At last, after months of pregnancy and hours of labor, your baby is born. Being the mother of a new baby is a huge responsibility. Unfortunately, it is a job for which we get very little training. You learn mothering skills by taking care of your baby. None of us, male or female, know instinctively how to change a diaper. That's something we learn, just as we learn the best way to hold a fussy baby. While we are learning how to do something new, chances are we will feel unsure of ourselves.

Here are some suggestions that will help build your confidence as a mother:

Believe in your ability to be a good mother. Give yourself credit for things you do well and build on them. For some women, recalling times caring for little brothers and sisters or nieces and nephews reminds them of their strengths.

Focus on the baby's basic needs. Babies need love, affection, food and warmth. Holding the baby, making eye contact, feeding, and changing are the most important things in life for a newborn. Meeting your baby's needs builds confidence in your parenting skills.

Give yourself permission to let go of advice that does not work for you. Each baby is different, and you are a different mother than your friend or relative.

Get some help. Ask family members or friends to help with shopping, cleaning or cooking. Discuss with your baby's father chores that he can take over. Although he may not do things the way you do, his way may work as well, or even better, than yours.

Get some rest. You need sleep to restore your energy. Nap when the baby does.

Share your experience. Plan outings with other new mothers. Join a moms-and-tots group. Plan a reunion with other families from your childbirth education class.

Relax. The best gift you can give your baby is time with you. No expensive toys or gadgets are as important as you are in your baby's life. You and your child have a special relationship. It will unfold as both of you grow and change. Remember to listen with your heart and see with the eyes of love.

To learn more, ask your healthcare provider or childbirth educator if there is a "Life with a Newborn" class. Any time you are concerned about your baby's health or your ability to care for your baby, do not be afraid to ask for help from relatives or friends. Always feel free to check with your healthcare provider.

Disclaimer: This content is reviewed periodically and is subject to change as new health information becomes available. The information provided is intended to be informative and educational and is not a replacement for professional medical evaluation, advice, diagnosis or treatment by a healthcare professional.

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